The Dating GAM

The Dating GAM

In February 2016 an GAM (Gay Asian Man) wrote to the Chicago Reader by stating the following

As a queer man of color—I’m Asian—I feel wounded whenever I am exposed to gay men in New York City, Toronto, or any city where white gay men dominate. Gay men, mostly whites and Asians, reject me because of my race, and no one admits to their sexual racism. I understand that sexual attraction is subconscious for many people. But it is unfair for a gay Asian like myself to be constantly marginalized and rejected. I fight for gay rights too. I believe in equality too. I had the same pain of being gay in high school and the same fears when coming out. Why is there no acceptance, no space, no welcome for me in this white-painted gay community? I’m six-foot-one, 160 pounds, fit, and very good-looking. What can I do? I might as well be a sexless monk.

The first thought that crossed my mind after reading that was “Why are you chasing after a group of guys that have no attraction to you?” You are just running around in circles. I wouldn’t waste my time. But alas some GAM don’t want to face reality.

Anyhoo the purpose for this particular blog post is to showcase a new website. which helps fellow Gay Asian Men navigate their ways through the dating world. Yes you young Gayling Asians, you can learn from your elders on what NOT to do. Believe me we have all been there.

The webmaster of this site, Edward Ho, told The Georgia Straight

“This website is about an opportunity for gay Asian men who have experience dating to share something that’s going to touch, move or inspire another gay Asian man who is struggling with…his dating life. This is really about community building and self-empowerment.”

The website is in its infancy, but check it out at

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